I know you. I was you.
After years of marriage, you’re beginning to get honest with yourself about how unhappy you really are. You feel guilty for feeling the way that you do. You blame yourself, you feel like a failure, and you truly believe that if you leave, you will devastate your kids. You feel stuck. And miserable. And don’t know what to do.
Or perhaps your marriage ended and you are heartbroken. You feel like you’ve been deserted and left to pick up the pieces. You are having a hard time moving on – maybe you’re still in love with your husband and he has moved on without you.
Or you are newly separated. You are learning how to be alone for the first time, how to date again, how to rediscover who you really are and what you really want. Maybe you feel confused, or selfish, or that you’ve been doing everything the wrong way. You likely feel overwhelmed by the challenges of single parenting and you can no longer rely on your husband’s help with household chores or your children. One moment you are feeling elated by what your future holds, yet another moment you are scared, exhausted, and paralyzed by what to do next.
Regardless of the chapter you may be in, I’ve been there too. Divorce sucks, it really
sucks – and it may be the hardest thing you go through. But that doesn’t mean you have to suffer.
You have permission to choose you.
You have permission to let go.
You have permission to be happy.
Life is too short to be miserable.
Through coaching, lectures, group programs, personal stories and weekly blogs, I will work to encourage, inspire and empower you to redefine how you interpret your own divorce, and create a life that you wake up loving.
Your divorce journey can last months, maybe even years, and this journey represents three unique chapters of your life. Chapters I, II, and III are all very different, as they have different problems and solutions, and require different coaching.
Which one are you in? Click on “This is Me” to learn more!
CHAPTER I: THE END IS NEAR
- You’ve worked on your marriage for years, yet it’s not getting any better. In fact, it’s getting worse.
- You feel deep down that you deserve something better, but you don’t know what that “something” is.
- You feel lonely and trapped.
- You fantasize about a loving relationship, yet all you seem to do is argue with your husband.
- If you have children, you fear that ending your marriage will ruin their lives. And that you are better off together in your marriage, just so they don’t suffer. You maybe be thinking, just 10 more years until they go to college so I am free.
- Your husband is a great guy, he loves you and supports you, which only makes you feel wrong, confused, and stuck.
My dear friend, you are not alone, because I am here for you.
There is a light at the end of this very unhappy, dark tunnel. There is a new life just waiting for you, and you have permission to let that happen.
CHAPTER II: NEWLY SINGLE
- You’re husband has moved out, and you’re living in a half-empty home. There are imprinted markings in the carpet from the furniture that now belongs in his home, and you are constantly reminded of his presence that is no longer there.
- Or you have moved out, and have had to buy new dishes or furniture that you’d never thought you’d have to get again.
- One minute you are excited about the new life that awaits you, but then another minute you are curled up on the floor, crying hysterically, wondering how you got to this place.
- If you have children, you are wrought with the guilt that the pain you once carried alone, has now fallen on to them.
- Or perhaps months have passed and you think you are ready to date. You’ve explored the scary world of online dating, only to find that there is no one out there.
- You begin to wonder if your married life was really that bad, and consider going back to your marriage and giving it another try.
My dear friend, this is all part of your journey
If you feel any or all of the above, please know that this is normal and you are NOT crazy. You are being taught a great lesson of finding self-love—the lesson IS there. These feelings can be healed if you learn to explore what your new path is and discover this new person called YOU.
CHAPTER III: THE NEW NORMAL
- Months or years have passed since you’ve been separarted. Your divorce is finalized.
- You have met someone who provides you with more love than you ever imagined, and you are ready to introduce him to your children. While you may be in love with your new partner, you wonder if your kids will embrace him.
- You feel guilt for finding the love of your life, because your children still love their father and hope that you will get back together with their dad.
- You feel like you are living 2 lives–one as a single mother and one as a new lover to your partner. Merging the two feels wrong, and close to impossible.
- Your ex-husband has moved on–he has found new love himself and while you may be over him, you are confused as to why this still hurts.
- After being deeply involved in your new relationship, you see patterns of your old marriage resurface. You find yourself getting angry at him for the things he hasn’t done, making you feel like your divorce will always be a black cloud.
- You have begun the phase of a blended family. Your new partner may have children, an ex-wife, and an old life that is now YOUR life. It feels overwhelming and you question whether it’s worth it.
First of all, pat yourself on the back that you have chosen to commit to someone, perhaps for life.
Luckily, this time around, you are equipped with some real experience that you didn’t have in your first marriage. And this experience CAN guide you in the right direction, rather than, the wrong. Step into your love and not your fear!